B's Endless Blog May 24th

I was awakened earlier to the sound of a didgereedoo, I don't spell check so correct me if I am wrong. It is the long Australian Aboriginal horn thingy that looks like a displaced alpine horn...pronounced as "didja redo" the copy for the new Swanson TV dinner ad? It wasn't one of course, but it was me making the sounds of one. Can't say how long it lasted, but I did continue for maybe 30 seconds admiring the sound. My bedroom backs onto a neighbour's, so I may hear about it sometime. I'm betting he did. For the life of me I cannot say why I would be doing that.

I had the pleasure of watching four brightly coloured birds with screechy voices on my balcony last evening. I took some pics. Serious yellow going on with areas of black and white. Is there such a thing as a black winged yellow bird?

In the afternoon, suffering from a combination of chicken and cabin fever, I cabbed it to the local Safeway for an outing. How pathetic is that? I ran into someone I know there and we had a long conversation about God. She told me that on any given day she does nothing without getting a distinct word or two from God telling her what he wants her to do. You know something? I think I believe her. It is a little unnerving to think she is hearing voices or at least a voice, but I was a didja redo about an hour ago, so where is my mental high ground? But I do find conversation with her stimulating in an unusual content kind of way, so I try not to be too judgmental. On a distantly related topic...I have never experienced love making with a devoutly Christian woman (Surprise!)and the thought intrigues me. Maybe that explains my unending attraction to them, I don't know. I could go on about this topic, but I think I will just leave it alone for now. Besides...it is as likely as me climbing Everest in my Speedos at this point.

Devotees of this rambling fare may recall that I was to lead a youth worship team next Sunday at the local Lutheran church. As yesterday's scheduled rehearsal was being cancelled I was informed that next Sunday is no good either. As the program features Easter theme music we are running out of time seasonally speaking.
I am in full debate with myself at this point, thinking I may as well haul myself onto the area set aside for the musicians and do it myself. But you can see where this could lead to all sorts of spinoff hurts and finger pointing so it is a tricky thing. I wish I hadn't volunteered to lead the service...it appears to have been a mistake. But...The Princess and I could knock this off with ease and grace and never mind the yoots with their busy lives. Most of them look like they are taking cod liver oil at rehearsal anyway...sigh. No good deed ever goes unpunished.

I am blessed with the most loyal friends in the world. They have taken that final step beyond tolerance to acceptance of me and my antics. I do not know why.
(Another person I know says that there is another step called enlightenment but as they haven't managed the other steps I can't place much store in that determination.)
It must require an enormous love to accept me without judgment. Or maybe they find it easy. I find loving them easy. It truly is easier to give love than to receive it.
You would think it would be the other way round. Until a few years ago, I always tried to outgift loved ones when an exchange of gifts was called for. I now see how that is problematic, as I would feel guilty about coming out "on top" if what I received outshone what I gave. The seamy underbelly to this thought process is that it makes the giving all about the giver. An "I win because I gave you a fur coat and you got me a metric wrench" kind of scenario. Not good. Nowadays I just give what I think would please without any connotation of contest. And I do love to give gifts. It is a blessing and curse. And I have learned to accept with a clear conscience mostly, although I wonder about any hardship that might be imposed on the giver. But the more I learn to discard balance sheets the better I feel and that is a wonderful place to be.