Shouting "FIRE!" in an empty theatre.

If I was to shout "Fire!" in an empty theatre, is it still a crime?
If I injured myself rushing for the exit, can I still sue?

Would a real anarchist subscribe to "Anarchy" magazine?
Would they make their stand by saving the entire years' issues...unread, then using them to ignite fires in police cars at international conferences?
Where is their line in the sand exactly?

If I love my neighbour, but don't want his wife to know...am I at least on the right track?

If I trap, then relocate...a slug...but it returns two years later...am I obligated to put it down?

Doesn't $25.00 for a single haircut seem a little pricey? I mean ...for ONE hair!
Hell...my barber offers a "Cut One...Get Three Thousand Free!" special every Tuesday.

I belong to the Free Association Club of Canada. It's all I can afford.

As I get older...should I switch to Absorbine Senior?

If a duck, a chicken, a pickle and a Rabbi go into a bar...is this a can't miss joke?

Is..."I'm not very good, but I'm quick" waaaay too honest for a pickup line?

If your Alphabet vegetable soup spells out "PETA Thanks You", have things gotten a little out of hand?

I have long had a fantasy of opening a little place of my own someday.
Gonna call it "The Inconvenient Store...Closed 24 Hours."
(Yes! We carry Anarchy magazine!!)

If you can't see a psychiatrist, should you try an optometrist first?

Would you be spoiling all the fun if you helped a man hoist his petard?

Petard? Time for bed, Byron.