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Friday, March 5, 2010

Can the Amish save the institution of marriage?

As I understand it, when Amish teens are maturing they are allowed to leave the community and explore the outside world for an extended period of time. I think as long as a year. They are then allowed to choose whether to return to the gentle life, or abandon it for whatever lifestyle they choose.
Now here's what I'm thinking. The institution of marriage, a very apt word, as anyone considering marriage ought to be committed... is in jeopardy. With the success rate offering odds akin to a Legion Hall meat draw, I have pondered many an hour as to what could help this dismaying situation. Cue the Amish...
Imagine for a moment that couples have a prenuptial agreement or understanding that after a mutually agreeable number of years, perhaps twenty or twenty-five, they have the option of spending a year apart to reconsider their lot in life. This would find both sexes smack dab in the middle of either the mythical male midlife crisis (mid-wife?), or the female peri-menopausal madness (very menopausal?), a pair of explosive deal-breaking emotional upheavals, if there ever was one. It's a time when couples are often filled with doubt about their choice of mate, career, car, lifestyle etc, and find themselves singing Peggy Lee's infamous, "Is that all there is?" as they wander aimlessly about the home.
Enter the sober second thought clause...
If a husband and wife had the option of living apart for a time and pursuing other interests, it could well offer a time of reflection on their marriage at a safe distance from the intrusions of their partners. It would upset the pattern of daily living, provide time to examine other lifestyles uninhibited by a mate, perhaps blow off some sexual steam, and venture into worlds unknown without anwering to anyone but yourself. Get that sports car, take a younger lover, read books instead of watch TV, travel, make paper airplanes, whatever...
I fully realize an option already exists, known as the separation agreement, but that's a guilty plea waiting for the final sentence of divorce. Exceptions to every rule of course, but in the main... it's over. It's now down to the question of who gets what. A legal feeding frenzy where everyone gets hurt but the lawyers, bless their teflon hearts.
Given the marriage dissolution statistics, I think this may provide an opportunity for couples to come to terms with their emotional misgivings, their fear over lost dreams, their boredom with the status quo, and to reconsider from a safe distance the value of their partnership with their spouse, and whether it is still a viable committment.
So there you have it.
Byron's Brave Solution to one of the most distressing social ailments of the world.
You're welcome.

1 Comments:

Blogger The Divine Miss E! said...

Lmao@So there you have it.
Byron's Brave Solution to one of the most distressing social ailments of the world.
You're welcome.

Why Thank you, B! hahaha

September 6, 2010 at 12:35 AM  

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